Revival

It's Sundurday Octember eleventy-five in the year of the 12th circle of hell. Please direct me to where I can submit my resignation. I've been on this ride for almost 10 months - I have vertigo, dejavu, symptoms of mild depression, characteristics of a sloth and what some might call an (insert air quotes here)... Continue Reading →

Last Dance

Remember that one time I signed up for a HIIT class, totally forgot, was reminded a minute before it started and was for sure still in bed eating a sandwich?  Yes, you read that correctly and no, I don't need your judgement.  I only threw up in my mouth twice.  Then I laid on the... Continue Reading →

Fire Swamp

Well well well - just when I thought everybody was out of control just enough, enter MURDER HORNETS!  Cause cicadas weren't enough.  No, no.  That's too biblical, they said.  We need something a little more modern, a little more sexy.  Viola murder hornets.  Maybe landsharks and sharknados aren't such crazy concepts afterall.  There really isn't... Continue Reading →

too hot for quarantine

Happy 'wtf is it so hot?' Thursday.  Just over here making a list of exit strategies for zoom.  'My computer died' has run its course.  People are getting suspicious.  It's like running into someone in the grocery aisle and there's no conversation to be had, so your only option is to jump into a pile... Continue Reading →

Quarantime

I don't know what day it is.  I for sure don't know what time it is.  I haven't been outside of my apartment in days.  I don't know who's touched what or why anything or if I'll ever have sex again.  The love of my life is somewhere out there and now I might never... Continue Reading →

My Funny GALentine

Well it's the day before Valentine's Day so I obviously have a lot to say.  I recommend a stiff drink or case of wine.  It's Thursday.  Treat yourself.  I celebrated by eating a pound of queso yesterday.  Whoopsie.  Back to Whole30 I go.  In the spirit of being a broke ass ho, I stayed in... Continue Reading →

Version of Me

I would have been Sporty Spice.  That is said with the assumption that Drunk Spice wasn't an option.  I love sports.  I do.  I was raised on it.  It's one of the main ingredients to what binds my family together.  And now it's that time of year when I wear orange and black once a... Continue Reading →

Champagne Supernova

As I have a tendency to do from time to time, I went down a rabbit hole the other day.  I am Alice in Wonderland's third cousin, once removed, for sure.  This time it was watching movie trailers on youtube.  I mean, I really went for it.  All the way down I went.  I texted... Continue Reading →

Beauty, Grace, United States

If you weren't at my house last night, be very sad you missed the undiscovered talent showcase my neighbors hosted in their apartment with a FULL band.  Drum set and all.  I can't wait to see what they come up with next.  I would also like to point out that not all of my neighbors... Continue Reading →

Vroom Vroom

Always opt to experience new things.  Adventure has a very special place in my heart.  Outside of the sea and dining in the dark, I support it.  And space...I have no interest in space.  All yours NASA.  No thank you.  Before this weekend, outside of Talladega Nights, I knew absolutely nothing about car racing.  Nothing. ... Continue Reading →

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