Huzzah!

While everyone else is fighting about masks and creating avatars, I'm at the 'I watched The Shining for the first time by myself on a Sunday afternoon' portion of my quarantine.  (please send help) Meanwhile, my neighbor is at the 'I was doing yoga and my elbow popped out of socket' section of her pandemic. ... Continue Reading →

Pursuit of Happyness

Do you feel like life is passing you by?  Do you find that there's not enough time in a day?  Are you having difficulty making space for yourself?  Try doing a plank for two minutes.  TIME HAS NEVER MOVED SO SLOW.  Hands down, the worst 120 seconds of your life.  Everything is about perspective, is... Continue Reading →

Fire Swamp

Well well well - just when I thought everybody was out of control just enough, enter MURDER HORNETS!  Cause cicadas weren't enough.  No, no.  That's too biblical, they said.  We need something a little more modern, a little more sexy.  Viola murder hornets.  Maybe landsharks and sharknados aren't such crazy concepts afterall.  There really isn't... Continue Reading →

Empty Chairs & Empty Tables

Aaaaaaaaaaand my belly-button is missing.  My life has become a never ending Oktoberfest.  What are standards?  Tell me all about them.  Sign me up for the Biggest Loser:  Quarantine Edition.  I had two boxes of Lean Pockets and a cherry coke for dinner the other night.  I had one friend who was giving me a... Continue Reading →

NonEssential

How are all those languages coming along?  Remember when a bat ruined my chances at ever seeing Hamilton or having sex?  Oh man...let's see...let me look at these tallies I've been making on my wall with lipstick I'll never wear again...it's day eleventy-five of this quarantine and so far my kitchen has flooded, I've murdered... Continue Reading →

The Best We Can

Ever feel like you're walking through life blindfolded in the dark searching for a pinata without a bat?  Asking for a friend.  The universe has always had my back but I feel like she's testing my limits these days.  Keeping my eyes peeled for that silver lining like a hawk.  I know I'm not alone. ... Continue Reading →

Don’t Mind Me

Just when I thought I'd lost all sex appeal, I got cat-called by a parrot this week.  Yes, you read that sentence correctly.  SHE'S STILL GOT IT!  Ugh.  So as far as where I'm at in life, I feel like I'm really soaring this week.  Add that with the fact I'll be over here dying... Continue Reading →

Potion Sky

If I could live anywhere, it would be inside of a book.  Cause let's be honest, I don't like a lot of people but I also love a lot of people.  I've recently discovered I'm an introverted extrovert.  I love talking but also crave silence.  I'm a walking contradictions, which tracks.  I'll want to dance... Continue Reading →

My Funny GALentine

Well it's the day before Valentine's Day so I obviously have a lot to say.  I recommend a stiff drink or case of wine.  It's Thursday.  Treat yourself.  I celebrated by eating a pound of queso yesterday.  Whoopsie.  Back to Whole30 I go.  In the spirit of being a broke ass ho, I stayed in... Continue Reading →

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