Pursuit of Happyness

Do you feel like life is passing you by?  Do you find that there's not enough time in a day?  Are you having difficulty making space for yourself?  Try doing a plank for two minutes.  TIME HAS NEVER MOVED SO SLOW.  Hands down, the worst 120 seconds of your life.  Everything is about perspective, is... Continue Reading →

Fire Swamp

Well well well - just when I thought everybody was out of control just enough, enter MURDER HORNETS!  Cause cicadas weren't enough.  No, no.  That's too biblical, they said.  We need something a little more modern, a little more sexy.  Viola murder hornets.  Maybe landsharks and sharknados aren't such crazy concepts afterall.  There really isn't... Continue Reading →

Empty Chairs & Empty Tables

Aaaaaaaaaaand my belly-button is missing.  My life has become a never ending Oktoberfest.  What are standards?  Tell me all about them.  Sign me up for the Biggest Loser:  Quarantine Edition.  I had two boxes of Lean Pockets and a cherry coke for dinner the other night.  I had one friend who was giving me a... Continue Reading →

NonEssential

How are all those languages coming along?  Remember when a bat ruined my chances at ever seeing Hamilton or having sex?  Oh man...let's see...let me look at these tallies I've been making on my wall with lipstick I'll never wear again...it's day eleventy-five of this quarantine and so far my kitchen has flooded, I've murdered... Continue Reading →

Don’t Mind Me

Just when I thought I'd lost all sex appeal, I got cat-called by a parrot this week.  Yes, you read that sentence correctly.  SHE'S STILL GOT IT!  Ugh.  So as far as where I'm at in life, I feel like I'm really soaring this week.  Add that with the fact I'll be over here dying... Continue Reading →

Leave Me Wild

I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving.  I took the day off this year as you might have noticed.  I spent the day with a beautiful group of friends that started with a polite spritz and ended in broadway show tunes.  My favorite kind of day.  I was extremely thankful for the gift of... Continue Reading →

Revolution

Finally watching Mandalorian while it's raining outside and my heart is so full!  Please give me more rainy days.  I miss the rain.  I miss the thunder and the lightning and how it creates this symphony of nature.  I know rain is correlated with sadness and depression but it brings me a sense of rebirth. ... Continue Reading →

Make it Count

I am currently watching The Mistletoe Secret on the Hallmark channel and, truth be told, it should have stayed a secret.  Yikes.  And if I say that, that it must be really bad because I love romance more than you love your boyfriend.  I am a hooker for corny rom-coms but I vote NO to... Continue Reading →

Funkytown

Whatawonderfullifeitiswhenyourspacebarworks.  I was a few seconds away from chucking my computer into the wall in a fit of rage.  I don't get a temper often...but when I do, I light things on fire.  Dear, Mercury.  Please explode.  Mercury is in retrograde and all communication and technology has been rendered useless.  And maybe you're not the... Continue Reading →

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