I’ll Scream

If you haven't posted a picture with #vaccinated in the caption, are you even real? Meanwhile, I've learned that I've been putting trash bags on wrong my entire life. Apparently you're supposed to wrap the top around the bin and then push down which means mine have been inside out since forever. Google it. But... Continue Reading →

Cancelled

I have heard more thunder in LA in the last 24 hours than all my years living here combined and I've never felt more alive. I love a storm. There's something magical about it - like the universe has let out a sigh. It's a weather cuddle really - which is all I've ever wanted.... Continue Reading →

MegaMillions

I found myself on the brink of buying a rooster utensil holder at 1 in the morning the other night, so you could say I'm DOING FINE. Luckily I had a friend tell me I should sleep on it - THANK YOU FRIEND. Don't worry, I had 18 other tabs of options open. Eezy breezy... Continue Reading →

Remember Me This Way

Well it's official. Jill's husband is our 46th President. I don't care if you're right-winged, left-winged, webbed-footed, black, blue, or blind - how Trump left the White House was childish and displayed a complete lack of character. It has been 152 years since a living President has not attended his successor's inauguration. 152 years. Have... Continue Reading →

Merry & Bright

'Hi' she says musically peeking from behind a corner with a mixture of mischief, apologies and trepidation. I know, I know - I ghosted you like a loser who snuck out the window in the middle of the night but is that a 2020 way to end the year or what? C'mon, you've let worse... Continue Reading →

The Meltdown

Well this week has been FULL OF SURPRISES!!! I received word that I was hired for my dream job and will now be PAID money to watch holiday films and write reviews! I met a man while I was out for a run and he's amazing! No psycho characteristics detected yet thus far. He's also... Continue Reading →

Unimaginable

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas and yet this year continues to surprise me on a catastrophic level. Today I worked out with a handle of vodka and a magnum bottle of wine. When in Rome, right? Or Indy. Whatever. I tried watching Jeopardy! while working out and just some advice, don't. Not... Continue Reading →

But Why?

This portion of quarantine has been brought to you by irrational emotions, boredom, cheesesteaks and Jeopardy! .  I mean, the majority of this year has been strange and mostly sad but now it's just gone flat-out 87 shades of wack-a-doo. LA has been put on a curfew 'til Christmas. Ohio has literally become the town... Continue Reading →

Quandaries

Day 11 of Whole30 and what I wouldn't give to smash my face into a magnum bottle of malbec right now.  Or a merlot soaked gouda.  Or a cupcake.  Or a candy apple covered in fruity pebbles.  Is it candy or candied?  Who cares.  My mouth is legit watering.  The amount of times I've murmured... Continue Reading →

SHIFTing

2020 has to be, at the very least, sponsored by people who'll put a box of Cheez-Its back in the pantry with a single cracker left inside and co-written by George R.R. Martin.  And if the ending is anything like the GOT series finale, lord help us all.  This past week, I was full on... Continue Reading →

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