Shake it Off

Alright, which of the gods hate me?  The one night I finally fall asleep like the damn Disney princess I know is inside of me somewhere yearning to be free and  EARTHQUAKES.ALL.NIGHT.  In my ten years living in LA, I've never been woken up by an earthquake.  I'm the girl that sleeps through the earthquakes. ... Continue Reading →

Huzzah!

While everyone else is fighting about masks and creating avatars, I'm at the 'I watched The Shining for the first time by myself on a Sunday afternoon' portion of my quarantine.  (please send help) Meanwhile, my neighbor is at the 'I was doing yoga and my elbow popped out of socket' section of her pandemic. ... Continue Reading →

Empty Chairs & Empty Tables

Aaaaaaaaaaand my belly-button is missing.  My life has become a never ending Oktoberfest.  What are standards?  Tell me all about them.  Sign me up for the Biggest Loser:  Quarantine Edition.  I had two boxes of Lean Pockets and a cherry coke for dinner the other night.  I had one friend who was giving me a... Continue Reading →

Quarantime

I don't know what day it is.  I for sure don't know what time it is.  I haven't been outside of my apartment in days.  I don't know who's touched what or why anything or if I'll ever have sex again.  The love of my life is somewhere out there and now I might never... Continue Reading →

Scary Movie Life

Well it's happened.  I am living my nightmare, starring in my own horror film.  Something I never thought possible.  (sigh) I didn't have a single sip of alcohol on St. Patrick's Day.  I'm a failure to myself, my family and all of Ireland.  I feel shame.  I don't even know who I am anymore.  This... Continue Reading →

My Mayhem

Well, some of us ran the L.A. marathon and some of us drank ten pounds of champagne and woke up in a 2 year old's room.  Wedding showers, am I right?  Get a group of girls together before the sun sets and you better clear the streets.  Talk about rebels without a cause.  Cause here's... Continue Reading →

The Best We Can

Ever feel like you're walking through life blindfolded in the dark searching for a pinata without a bat?  Asking for a friend.  The universe has always had my back but I feel like she's testing my limits these days.  Keeping my eyes peeled for that silver lining like a hawk.  I know I'm not alone. ... Continue Reading →

Leave Me Wild

I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving.  I took the day off this year as you might have noticed.  I spent the day with a beautiful group of friends that started with a polite spritz and ended in broadway show tunes.  My favorite kind of day.  I was extremely thankful for the gift of... Continue Reading →

Absurdist

Question of the week:  What is sleep? Tell me all about it so I can live vicariously through you.  My brain is an energizer bunny.  I'll lie there for hours, trying to will myself to sleep, and she just won't quit.  Right when I think I'm finally dozing off, I begin wondering things like -... Continue Reading →

Love Will Find a Way

Yesterday was the 18th anniversary of 9/11.  18 years ago, I sat through my 8am class at Indiana University unaware of the horror happening in our country.  Those were the days when I channeled my undiagnosed A.D.D. through doodling, writing lyrics and literal daydreaming which, often times, morphed into sleeping through class.  Whoops.  I will... Continue Reading →

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