unkindness

Hi, I'd like one ticket to Normal-land and a bottomless strawberry margarita...and a cupcake. Everyone through with their panic purchasing? You all set with your Burger King cup of gasoline, Gary? Did you store it on top of your TP I'm sure you still have stockpiled in the closet from a year ago that you... Continue Reading →

goodness

I have been plagued by crickets. They're after my soul. I didn't sleep for almost a week because of a cricket outside of my door. Apparently it's mating season. Congratulations, but you can't do that here. At my breaking point, I grabbed a wooden spoon from the kitchen and went out into the courtyard like... Continue Reading →

storyteller

You know how you see things on TV or in the movies and you're like - how stupid are you? Flashback to this weekend when I text someone, 'Houston, there no tp in here SOS!' to which the response was, 'You're in Houston?' And this is when I realized I had text the wrong person.... Continue Reading →

take my breath away

My biggest love affair to date has been with the outdoors. Still managing to take my breath away all these years later. This picture makes me so happy. I saw it at a nature preserve in North Carolina and I stood staring at it for ages. It's beautiful...the way the light finds its way through... Continue Reading →

Boop!

I still don't know what "hedge funds" are or wtf a bitcoin is but I do know if you aren't buying wine from Ralph's/Kroger by the 6-pack, you're doing it wrong. I paid $66 for what should have been over $200 of wine and bubbles. Even the cashier went 'SHIT!' after he saw the total.... Continue Reading →

MegaMillions

I found myself on the brink of buying a rooster utensil holder at 1 in the morning the other night, so you could say I'm DOING FINE. Luckily I had a friend tell me I should sleep on it - THANK YOU FRIEND. Don't worry, I had 18 other tabs of options open. Eezy breezy... Continue Reading →

Unimaginable

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas and yet this year continues to surprise me on a catastrophic level. Today I worked out with a handle of vodka and a magnum bottle of wine. When in Rome, right? Or Indy. Whatever. I tried watching Jeopardy! while working out and just some advice, don't. Not... Continue Reading →

Thanks

I don't know why I'm surprised every year I have to post on Thanksgiving. And yet, here I am, mystified beyond belief. While I have a very twisty relationship with the historical origins of this day, I can step back enough to appreciate the sentiment of being thankful. Personally, I have had some of my... Continue Reading →

Little Psychos

I carved a pumpkin for the first time in my adult life.  Felt pretty good about it.  That said pumpkin is already decayed and molded due to sweating-just-standing-here degree weather in October because THIS IS WHERE THE DEVIL LIVES.  Thank you, LA.  Alas, it's finally less than 100 degrees in LA and my sweet little... Continue Reading →

Not Yesterday

Well it's happened.  My emotions have boiled over.  I've finally reached the crying portion of quarantine.  I legit can't stop and I know I'm behind in this trend and a lot of you have been crying everyday since March but someone grab a life hammer and save me from this snowglobe of tears.  I typically... Continue Reading →

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