Wtf

I hate to be the reality grinch, but sometimes life just isn’t going to make sense.  I’m sure you’ve figured that out by now, but in case you’re still living in a glass menagerie, I want to be sure that you’re fully aware that life does not come with instructions and sometimes it’s an Ikea project that was on backorder and then showed up without the Japanese interpreter putting it together would require.  Sometimes you’re going to want to throw your hands up, scream a few choice words and run for the hills…possibly even sprint.  I am still constantly surprised and forever amused.

There is a lot of decision making involved in a lifetime.  If you know me at all, you are quite aware that this is not my forte.  Blockbuster used to be an epic journey for me.  I’ll try on a minimum of 5 outfits before I leave the house.  I find myself in the grocery store and before I know it, I’ve been staring at marinara sauce for ten minutes.  I’m comparing prices, studying labels, fixated on ingredients, checking for coupons- it’s like, who has time for all that?!

I’ve put a lot of thought into this because for someone with so many opinions you’d think  decision making would be my jam.  I’m not sure whether it’s because I’m a people pleaser, complacent, or am straight up incapable of critical thinking but choices make my mind melt and give me buckets full of anxiety on top of anxiety.  A lot of eenie, meeny, miny, moe goes into my thought process.  Kidding.  Maybe sometimes.  I’m better at big decisions than small ones.  I’ll turn around on a Tuesday, say I’m moving to Australia and by Friday I’ll have a one way flight booked.  Ask me what kind of ice cream flavor I want and I’ll stare at you like you just asked me to make Sophie’s choice.

Life is hard.  There are going to be times you don’t know what to do and it’s going to be really confusing.  You will do things, say things and hear things that don’t make any kind of sense.  We call it the gray area.  I’ve come to realize not everything is meant to be understood.  There are a lot of things I’ve come across that just don’t make sense.  Why is the Cincinnati airport in Kentucky?  The Kardashians.  In homage to Steve Martin in Father of the Bride, why can’t hotdog and hotdog bun companies correlate their packaging?  Why do I always pick the longest checkout line?  If anyone can explain to me why Braille is on a drive-thru ATM, I’ll still think it makes no sense.  Finger band-aids.  There has to be a better way.  How do I lose my AppleTV remote 12 times during a 30 minute show?  Why on God’s great wi-fi saturated land am I seeing velour in clothing stores again?!  WHY?!

There will be a lot of unanswered questions, unsolved mysteries, and unspoken truths you’ll never discover.  So I implore you to take charge of the parts of your life that are important to you and you can control.  Don’t make life harder for yourself than it already is.  You are guaranteed to be unsure of yourself from time to time.  You’ll make a decision and you won’t know whether it was the right one or not.  There will be days you feel completely and utterly lost.  You’ll look around and think to yourself ‘How did I get here?’  Embrace the unknown if you must and trust that you are always where you are meant to be at any given moment.  Even as I typed that I questioned whether or not that’s true or if it’s just something people say to make themselves feel better.  Kinda like the good luck if it rains on your wedding day thing.  Is it just glorified optimism or wishful thinking?  Guess we’ll never know 😉