My thoughts on Life, Writing, Hollywood, Children, My Neighbors, Love & Growing Up
For the amount of times I use the phrase 'I can't wait to tell my grandkids', you'd think I'd have several children. Alas, I don't even have a date lined up. And I waver between being the most okay with it and utterly bored about it. At this point, if he shows up I'm just... Continue Reading →
Still not really sure how it's July or 2021 or Thursday or anything anymore. I need a time machine and a basket of champagne. I hope everyone had a great weekend. I know celebrating America can be divisive but I like to think of it as a celebration of our rebellion against the authority, splitting... Continue Reading →
A year into this thing and it's starting to feel like that one roadtrip to Florida when we were "almost there" for what felt like a quarter of my life. Don't worry, by June we'll be in the -insert whatever color you want here- tier. OH WILL WE MARGO?! Don't you dare get my hopes... Continue Reading →
I have heard more thunder in LA in the last 24 hours than all my years living here combined and I've never felt more alive. I love a storm. There's something magical about it - like the universe has let out a sigh. It's a weather cuddle really - which is all I've ever wanted.... Continue Reading →
I still don't know what "hedge funds" are or wtf a bitcoin is but I do know if you aren't buying wine from Ralph's/Kroger by the 6-pack, you're doing it wrong. I paid $66 for what should have been over $200 of wine and bubbles. Even the cashier went 'SHIT!' after he saw the total.... Continue Reading →
Happy post Scorpio conception day! At least everyone knows where they stand in their relationships now. And if you're trying to figure out an LA relationship - GOOD LUCK! - she yells through a megaphone with a very sarcastic thumbs up. I was at the grocery over the weekend feeling attacked by the Cupid inspired... Continue Reading →
'Hi' she says musically peeking from behind a corner with a mixture of mischief, apologies and trepidation. I know, I know - I ghosted you like a loser who snuck out the window in the middle of the night but is that a 2020 way to end the year or what? C'mon, you've let worse... Continue Reading →
It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas and yet this year continues to surprise me on a catastrophic level. Today I worked out with a handle of vodka and a magnum bottle of wine. When in Rome, right? Or Indy. Whatever. I tried watching Jeopardy! while working out and just some advice, don't. Not... Continue Reading →
Honestly, how is it Thursday again? The Bengals already lost again? I can't even remember what I did yesterday. Who's on First? What happened to Monday and where are my pants? You ever wonder if you're really just an avatar and someone out there is severely disappointed in your performance? Are we the topics of... Continue Reading →
Ahhh, yes, the time of year when everyone rages about Columbus and tells you if you don't vote a certain way, you don't love them while everyone else threatens to leave the country - it's the most wonderful time of the year! Since I'm not sure when I'll ever be able to use my passport... Continue Reading →
**RETROSPECTACULAR** 